How We Met
As all great (millennial) love stories start - we matched on Tinder. It was summer 2020, and there wasn’t much going on.
Except for a heated presidential election, an unprecedented worldwide health crisis, and everything was on fire. America’s morale (gauged by Twitter) was at an all-time low. You couldn’t buy toilet paper, nothing was worth showering for, and my mental health was a solid 2 out of 10. So I decided it was the perfect time to meet someone.
I downloaded Tinder and uploaded a photo of myself sitting on the floor of a New York City subway car devouring nachos. Then, I uploaded 5 additional photos that were just of my cats.
I swiped right on Jordan. He swiped right on me. I’m still not sure why he read my bio and thought, “this is definitely someone I should initiate an interaction with,” but I’m thankful he did.
We texted. I forgot to respond. He triple-texted. We decided to meet in-person. Then I rescheduled several times. 30 minutes after we were supposed to meet, I called him to say: “Hey, so, I’m not an ‘on-time’ person. I’m running super late, but I’m on my way.”
He laughed and said, “yeah, we’re gonna get along great. I actually haven’t left my house yet.”
We stayed on the phone until we both pulled up at the Tavern.
How We Knew
Right before I left my house, I shared my location with a close friend (as millennials do). I texted her to say that I was going on a date but definitely not looking for anything serious.
3 hours later I sent her a follow-up text saying, “actually this person is my soulmate.”
Our first date lasted like, 10 hours.
I knew from the second I pulled up to the bar and the tiniest human in the world got out of her equally small Honda Fit. The first thought that popped into my head was, ”wow, she reverse-catfished me with those terrible Tinder photos.” The second was, ”This is the most radiant woman I’ve ever seen in my life.” I mean, yeah, she’s stupidly hot, but that wasn’t necessarily the origin of the thought.
I instinctually have an uncannily good read of people. Humans come in a wide variety of personality flavors, but there’s a rare kind that I’ve only come across a handful of times in my life. It had bothered me for years trying to figure out how to define it, but it clicked the moment I met her. The closest term I’ve been able to find to define it is the French phrase ‘Joie De Vivre’, which means an exultation of spirit. When you look into her eyes long enough, there’s a flame. Bergen is a tiny human with a booming life force. It was as if there was an invisible, swirling energy manifesting outwards from an incredible presence.
You’d think that would equate to some boisterous tank of a human, but it doesn’t. She was/is calm, soft-spoken, and gentle. She laughed at my stupid jokes. She never broke eye contact once when I helplessly spilled out secrets I had never told anyone before. She pretended to like Fuji.
Three hours later, I got up and sent a text from the bathroom to my friend, “This is the best date I’ve ever been on, I think she might be my soulmate.”
How We Got Married
It was summer 2021.
It was a Monday.
What started as “wouldn’t it be funny if we got married today,” suddenly became dead-serious when we realized that we actually wanted to get married - like, now. It was 2:30pm, and Jordan called the courthouse to see if it was possible to get married that afternoon. The person who answered probably thought we were insane. They said, “yeah, but you’d have to get here before 4pm.”
Then I asked Jordan if he actually wanted to get married today. He said yes. Then, he got down on both knees and asked me the same thing.
We texted 2 close friends and asked if they could meet us at the courthouse. We provided them with zero context, and they both showed up anyway, with no questions asked (except for “is it fine if I’m wearing jeans?”). We got married at 4:30pm. Mike bought us burrito bowls at Chipotle for dinner.
Best Monday, ever.
Bergen is leaving out a critical part for my benefit. What she didn't mention is that I was having one of – not even exaggerating – the worst days of my life.
That's the kind of person she is and it's one of the things I love the most about her. She can take the most abhorrent things in the world and replace them with good. Everything she does adds a net gain to the universe.